For you

Q: How do you know whether you're married to a Booklander?

A: To see whether your spouse might be a Booklander, ask yourself what you think their take is on these concepts.

Concept Booklander's Take Outlander's Take

Self Sufficiency
Know how to do things. Make enough money so you can hire people to do things for you.
Money Money is like that excellent fertilizer, the stuff that just makes everything grow. It's smelly and dirty, so you don't want too much of it lying around. Just have enough to meet your anticipated needs. I may go to church or temple but my god is Mammon. I don't care if he smells, I need him and I worship him.
Control The more self sufficient I am, the more I can teach my kids how to have some control over their destiny. Of course you can never really be in complete control. That's life, get over it. I don't like to talk about control, I just need to have it. Especially over those who are close to me. Marriage is war, get over it.
Unconditional Love It's the only kind. Use "unconditional love" as a reward when your spouse does things your way.
Judgment "Judge not, lest ye be judged." There's no better way to keep your spouse under control, and thus be victorious in your marriage, than by constantly judging. The aquittals must be few and insignificant compared to steady stream of condemnations, which must always be severe no matter how minor the infraction. Remember that there's no jury; the audience is just yourself and the accused. Thus the more outrageous the accusation the more you will provoke your spouse to do something that genuinely discredits himself/herself, scoring yet another point for yourself.
Fights Fight fair. Own your failings. They don't call me Queenš of Denial for nothing.
šor King
Smiles You owe smiles to people you care about. They owe you smiles. Smiles are not to be bartered or withheld for a better deal. Smiles are powerful, especially with people close to you. So know what you're getting in return before you go giving out a smile. Withholding smiles skillfully from your spouse will get you an extra measure of control.

More helpful thoughts on marriage:

Mark Twain advises:

"Keep away from people who belittle your ambitions. Small people will always do that, but the really great make you feel that you too can become great."

                                                                        (But Mark, what if you're married to a belittler of ambitions?)

"Great people talk about ideas, average people talk about things, and small people talk about wine."
                                                                                                                    -Fran Lebowitz

                                                                                "...and kitchens." 

Do you suppose Fran Lebowitz likes suburban dinner parties?